Close your eyes for a moment dear reader (psyche! you can't close your eyes & read unless you've got crazy plastic transparent eyelids or extra eyeballs on the end of your fingertips, but I'll save that for another post) & imagine this scene. You're walking down the street, it's sunshiney out, the birds are singing, and you're feeling such a rare moment of complete and total bliss that you're caught totally unaware when a crack in the sidewalk interrupts your stride and down you go. Ow! Bummer!! Not only did you fall in front of a bunch of people, but as you fell you snapped your ankle, tried to save yourself by grabbing onto a baby carriage, collapsed anyways bringing the carriage down with you, hurling the tiny infant inside into the path of oncoming traffic, where it was immediately decimated by a semi, and now everyone's looking at you like an assh*le, but alas with your broken ankle you've no chance of making a speedy getaway!
Talk about embarrassing!!
But imagine things had gone this way. Sure you trip, but manage to catch your balance. It's a sweet thrill, the risk of danger, the sweet relief of poking risk in the booty & walking away unscathed. But there's more to it than that, I'd argue that the closer you come to eating sh*t the more sweet it is. We've all almost died numerous times from the barely avoided car crash, the slipping on the precipice of danger, or any one of a host of other dangers that are only escaped through a juxtaposition of accelerated thought/action and the devil's own luck. There's really only one drawback to the experience, and that's when you try to tell your friends about how close to oblivion you walked and they just can't get it.
But essentially that's the solitary beauty of almost eating sh*t. It's as cool as coolness gets, You almost died, YOU escaped danger & peril, YOU trimuphed over odds that were quickly stacked against you without warning, and only YOU can truly appreciate the poignance of the experience. Sure, you can talk about it all you want but really no one else will ever really get it, the terror, the exhiliartion...?
It's like having a secret affair with the world, and it totally kicks ass!!
